As I write about my personal journey, I feel as though I should share some thoughts that have gone through my head over the past six months. There are a lot of negative associations that a lot of "People" (I use the general term "society" here) have about the obese, or those that seek out weight loss surgery (or WLS for short). A lot of narrow minded idiots, the uninformed, or just people who might care but don't understand what it's about, judge without really knowing the whole story about why someone might seek out this extreme procedure, or tool, to help them take back control of their lives.
It's true that some people do seek out WLS without really being ready for it. They get this huge, life changing surgery without really knowing what it's going to take to make the life changes necessary to maintain long term weight loss. Whatever their story, it just doesn't work for them. But that's not the case for me. Here is what I've come up with over the past six months. For me, it's gospel truth.
Before I go further with my story, I want to get that out of the way right now. For those people who think WLS is the easy way out, you are kidding yourself. If you think it is easy to eat your way fat, and then just diet your way skinny, or just exercise it all off, you are nuts. Are you an alcoholic? Have you ever smoked? Have you ever craved something? Sex? Maybe a particular food you just had to have? A thing? Movie, game, piece of sports equipment or clothing? Well, imagine that instead of those things, even drugs, that you crave food. Food has chemicals (especially food of today-- processed foods with chemicals) that act in your brain to cause feelings of addiction. You crave something, you must have it. So you get it, then when you get it, you can't just have one. You must have it ALL. Or you DO have one, then you can't stop thinking about it. Sounds like a crush on a cute guy, right? But for a food addict you might be talking about a stupid bag of chips! How lame does that sound? But it's very real... and the shame we feel is very real. For an addict, it's very real. I know how cruel I was to tell my fiancee to just "STOP DOING THAT!" when he was trying to stop smoking. To just "be strong and do it!" How stupid I was. For an addict, sometimes you just can't stop. You need help. So, when I realized I was addicted to food, I found help. I found a therapist. And she helped me. I had medication. And guess what... for the first time in my life, I found peace. I was able to get through those days without food ruling my life, literally I could go through those candy aisles and gas station stops without buying things that would set me back pounds and hours and calories. That is a big accomplishment for a food addict. Just like an alcoholic at a TGI Friday's during Happy Hour with the guys from work. You do it one day at a time... lol.
Food addiction is real. It's as real as alcoholism, drug addiction, nicotine addiction. There are physical and mental components. Whether you think it's real or not, I know it was true for me. I fight it every day, and thanks to counseling and medication, I have a much better handle on it than I did. I would NEVER have been successful with this surgery without those two things.
Next.... the journey to surgery day.
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